Life Happens

What could be more appropriate than this picture at this particular time in my life? I mean that in a funny way. :) I imagine what's going through the head of this camera person at that moment is, "OH S***!" (Edited for those who don't appreciate the potty mouth) :)

It seems as if I was hit by this figurative bull, and have been trying to regain conciousness for the past 3 weeks. :) I Believe everything happens for a reason- reasons we usually don't know at the time. I can see the good that will eventually come from all this, but right now it is hard. I'm trying to understand myself better and gain some real substance. :) I also believe that through our experiences we can learn to better assist others- and so I hope that by reading about my experiences you can feel better...knowing that we all go through stuff...and that it is really ok.

DJ and I have had a difficult time getting along ever since the first year of marriage. We've talked about divorce from time to time, and have basically tolerated the situation and suffered our way through for 8 years. I say "we" with a complete conviction that the fault lies with both of us. We haven't ever been able to understand each other in the way the other person would like to be understood. We have hurt each other and we have grown into different people than we once were.

I guess there is no avoiding this bull- :) - I've taken the full body blow. The question now is the recovery from the major multi-system trauma that it caused. :) This is a major turning point in my life. Figuratively, the paramedics came and took me to the hospital where I was in surgery, the doctors were able to stop the bleeding and saved my life. :) This was in the literal form of very good friends and family who I can not appreciate enough. I have also started seeing a therapist to get some different perspectives- from someone who doesn't know me and can offer opinions I won't take as judgements. :) In the past I would have been embarassed to admit that I need to see a therapist...but I want to apologize for my pride in wanting everyone to think I didn't need help. We all do at times. Then at other times, we are the helpers.

Thanks to you all and know of my love for each one of you! :)